Friday, September 21, 2012

The Literalist Problem Solver

This morning while it was still dark and I don't know what time it was because my eyes were trying SO hard to stay closed: Pursy jumped on our bed. This happens every morning and usually she watches an episode or two of Yo Gabba Gabba on my phone while I lay there hoping that today will be the day she agrees with me that it is too early to be awake and put herself back to sleep.

Today she put her face super close to mine and whispered : "I want juice water and I have to go potty".

Craps.

One thing I can ignore and the other I cannot. So I got out of bed, and tried to find humor in the fact that once again a new day was being heralded in with the sounds of a 2.5 year old pooping. I crawl back into bed after dolling out the 2 gummy bear reward and Pursy is right behind. She gets into bed with me, puts her face close to mine and whispers: "I want juice water".

Of course. But this time, I don't feel guilty about saying, "Purslane, the juice water is downstairs and I am upstairs. You will have to wait until it is time to go down for breakfast".

I did not realize this was interpreted as a gauntlet being thrown down.

She sat there for a minute, then jumped off the bed and padded down the hall. My silly, should have known better self was already back asleep. A few minutes later I hear a sound I have never heard before. A sort of step-clunk-slosh sound repeating itself over and over- and getting closer. A minute later, a plastic jug of condensation-covered green juice rolls into bed and settles next to my warm arm. I shriek and jump a foot in the air, and as my body begins its descent, I hear:

 "Mama- the juice water is upstairs! Now can I have some juice water?"



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