Thursday, July 7, 2011

Evolution's Way of Continuing the Human Race

Mother praying mantis' eat their young. And you couldn't really blame them. Have you seen a baby praying mantis? Not so cute. But baby humans? Charles Darwin said "Babies are the evolutionary goal of procreation realized". So we look at our babies and give ourselves a big mental high five. We did it- we created a human and thus, in the words of Celine Dion "my heart will go on". (not perfectly applicable, but thought it would be funny to quote Darwin and Dion in the same paragraph.)

Today, Purslane is testing my evolutionary goal of perpetuating the species. It is only 1:30 in the afternoon and she has pulled out all the envelopes from two new boxes (60 envelopes total), created two diapers so disgusting in scope and scent that I had to open a window, deleted at least 3 contacts from my cell phone, refused to eat any of her pears or cucumbers thus reducing her lunch to cheese and half a piece of bread, ripped the space bar off the computer (which has made typing this a labor of love), full fist grabbed my left nipple while trying to pull herself up into my lap, and decided to only nap for an hour-half of which she spent whimpering in such a way as to make my heart hurt.

So I sat her down with her favorite peekaboo book with firm instructions to "give Mama 5 minutes to check email". She was quiet for about 45 seconds and then I heard her rummaging around in the bottom desk drawer. The next thing I knew, she had crawled up on the chair behind me, put both arms around my neck and said "Hi!", Dada's headphone around her neck. Evolution wins again.

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